Dating sites.

Why on earth, I´m having my profile in some dating site despite I look handsome? Because I´m clumsy with women, the total opposite of a hunter.

And why dating sites has sometimes bad reputation? Because men/women are dishonest, if I understood well.

I don´t mention about some women looking 15 years old less than their real civil status, and able “to play” with, which is a white lie, and nobody´s perfect.

As living at Paris for ages, I put my profile there in some French site, year 2000, and luckily for me, I got chance. I found a mature woman, who said directly to me on the phone that she is not looking for a stable relation because she is recently divorced and wanting to enjoy her freedom.

I´m not thinking with “Mister Dick”, because looking for a stable relation, but I´m a man, I have a dick, meaning that we found an arrangement, and that was somehow, a stable and long discreet relation.

Year 2004, because spending my holidays in Finland, a Finnish friend help me to place my profile in some Finnish dating site, and I found someone behaving very nicely, in the beginning.

Year 2005, she asked to me to move permanently to Helsinki.

Because having a big feeling for her, also thinking imprudently that, mature woman means automatically mature in the behavior, I said “yes” and I came then. That was a mistake because she is mentally disturbed.

When you are disturbed and intelligent, you start a therapy.

When you are disturbed and stupid, you severely piss-off your partner.

Once, during a trip on boat, she has decided (she was all the time deciding what to do), to place us just in the middle of a band of Finn skinheads, despite I´m colored!

After a relation like war and peace, I went back to France.

Year 2012, after got my Finnish residence permit and a flat, I´ve decided to look for some stable relation at Helsinki, and I put my profile at Suomi24.fi.

Beforehand, I did some investigation on Internet, checking the comments and experiences of these peoples using regularly the dating sites.

Example: when a sexy woman is posing, as wearing trendy accessories and expensive watch), it´s better to avoid, because she is looking for man having money.

When having a profile, the rule is that you must to put one or two photos, and there everyone can watch your face, yours eyes because eyes are like a mirror, and the silhouette.

Honestly, I´m getting bored to hear some telling that body-type has no importance, what is important is the heart. Because body-type has a small importance.

By the way: physical attraction is not what do you think.

Once, I sent a message to some XL woman, and she replied to me, that she can´t manage because, she got more of one hundred replies.

That means that no need to look like a fashion model.

Beware about a photo showing only a nice face, because if he/she is showing only the face, that means a problem. If you want to meet this person, you take the risk of a big surprise.

Once, I didn´t obey to the rule and I got meeting with some woman, and I got a big surprise.

Some profiles are fake: I´m mentioning those photos of girls looking like Miss Suomi or Miss France.

When someone having a profile without photo sent a message to you, ask for a photo first, before continuing. And never trust people arguing again and again.

Bravely, I wrote in my profile a lot about me, which is a mistake, because you don´t have to write your life there. Some profile looks like a book.

We are living in a world where many peoples are disturbed, and strangely, majority of them are from divorced parents. Perhaps there is some investigation to do then, by some psychologist.

Of course, I´ve been in contact with several of them, and when you are writing a sentence they don´t appreciate, they get angry, able to insult before blocking you.

The real stupid is able to insult very fast.

Example, this woman named Johanna who wrote after we met in a bar, talking like good friends there, that she will call the police if I want to meet her again, despite that I didn´t harass her!

Do you know what? She is working in the Finn mental hospital at Helsinki!

That is risky to write some famous sentence made by some stars, and ridiculous per moment. Don´t do it.

As sending my messages to these unknown ladies, I´m remember the warning of a man who is registered in several dating sites, including some giant international ones:

- The problem is that some women can have a crush on you, able to behave like women in love, but after about 3 or 4 months, they are able to break the relation for any kind of ridiculous reason, which is immature starting 40 years old where you are supposed to know what do you want.

What is easy in some dating site like Suomi24.fi, is that you have several icons to click there: Elämänkumppani, Seksi, Treffiseura Ystävyys, etc.

Because looking for a stable relation, I avoid automatically the profiles where is the icon “seksi”.

Something else: as being peaceful guy, I don´t send a message to a woman who wrote “temperamenttinen” in her text.

As watching those profiles, I can see such a big percentage of women looking for “valkoinen mies”or writing in the text, “Etsin mukavaa suomalaista miestä”, and I´m sorry but in the French dating site, the percentage is less.

For a while, I had meeting at the bar with several women… Yawning…

Finally I met a chief counselor in a minister, and on her profile, she clicked on the icon “Elämänkumppani”, which is perfect for me.

Three months later, she broke the relation, and as I´ve asked why to her, she replied: “It´s like that”.

Bravely, I went back again on this Suomi24.fi, and I saw many women, still the same there, who´ve been registered since age.

So found a woman named Simone, who clicked on the icon “Elämänkumppani”, exactly what I´m looking for, and we start a relation then.

What´s wrong then? Suddenly, she said to me that she will move permanently to Boston MA, for job.

Wait a minute: she put her profile on Suomi24, knowing per advance that she will move permanently abroad, meaning that she should throw to the trash the man she will meet, and anyway if he is a right guy or a bastard, angel or demon?

Honestly, that is not honest at all, and totally egoistic behaviour.

Of course, I´m a sinner, but in the other hand, I´m a Christian and proud about. I can´t imagine to consider a woman like shit.

This second time, I got angry and I´m ashamed to confess it right now, but don´t worry: the anger disappeared.

The fact is that these two women were only interested to find a guy to fuck with.

We were meeting only during the weekend and after that, nothing still the following weekend.

They never presented me to their friends and they never invited me to some parties.

Why they didn´t click on “Seksi”, on their profiles? They should get huge amount of men wanting just to fuck and nothing else.

They didn´t do it because they were ashamed to be considered like hole.

Why they didn´t say to me during the first meeting? Because as pure selfish females, they don´t care.

Sorry but I´m not a Kleenex, and I respect who respect me. That mean that I have no respect for that kind of creature, and just say “Go to hell, slut!”.

After this second relation, I went to tell everything to the black dog of my neighbor, a bit old and knowing a lot about life, and he said to me:

- Warf warf: don´t get mad about these two females, because warf warf, you´ll meet someone better quality. Warf warf!

Some women are complaining saying that many men are not serious and that is right. Strangely, when they meet a man “serious”, they doesn´t respect him. More strangely, they would like that their daughter meet a serious boy, someone they don´t like?

The lesson is, don´t trust what is written on the dating sites.

Also beware about some very good-looking girls, that is fake or Russian looking for residence permit or worst: some mafia wanting money.

And when a woman you are mailing with, suddenly stop to reply, that means she met someone else: don´t wait for her.

Better to avoid to send a message to these profile registered there since age: they are demanding and worst, some don´t know what they want. And don´t believe some of them saying that they are still there because they met some friends and chatting with. That is a lie: when you have a friend, you have his phone number, also for chatting there is Facebook.

By the way: why to put several photos of the nature, park, forest, in some profiles? A man is not interested to meet a park, but to meet a woman.

When a woman replies to a foreigner, writing in a perfect English style, “that won´t work because of the difference of language”, she is telling a lie. The fact is that she doesn´t want continue (or to start) with.

Never send a message to a woman writing that she is intelligent: all the stupid (men/women) that I met in my past life was sure to be intelligent.

No need to be a profiler, to be able to read between the lines. Example, this text from a woman bellow:

Parasta maailmassa: ”Oma koti, oma poika, oma koira, oma arki, elämä! Oma mies sitten kun löytyy se oikea”… 

The man is placed at the last level, and I hope that he will agree about.

When a woman is posting several photos of her kids, that mean that she is not looking for a man, but rather for a father.

Some lesson is: let´s spend about a trimester when you just start a relation, and don´t take it too seriously, because some men/women are able to break for any kind of ridiculous reason.

At the time of the split, the cowardice of women is equal to the cowardice of men.

Okay, we are living in a decadent world, but that is not a reason to behave like decadent, and that is my point of view.

Something else: many persons doesn´t really know what they want, able to change totally their meaning about you, which is ridiculous starting a certain age old where you´re supposed to know what do you want… But, “C´est la vie”.

I forgot to say that some women from this dating site became my FB´s friends: they think that I´m funny, which is not enough from them, to start a relation, and I don´t mind. That experience was something positive.

Nowadays, I´m enjoying my peaceful and my freedom… And I removed my profile then.

Jean-Jacques Hubert Mages.